Monday, September 2, 2013

Expectations For Our Children And For Our Adults

My friends,

I have noticed a big shift in parenting - and it is one that saddens me.  Children of this era are not only being raised by computers, televisions, and electronic toys - but they are also being raised with diminished manners, and an overall disregard for their fellow humans.

In a previous post, I noted what my expectations are for my child for her future life (mainly to be a  independent, self-sufficient, and happy adult with a good moral compass).  I still feel that those are really what the governors for her life should be.

However, I am noticing a on-going (and alarming) trend in our youth which really now continues on up into the adult ranks.  That trend is what appears to be a total lack of respect for other people, governing rules, and property.  Not only have please and thank-you's started disappearing, but so have any signs of empathy or caring.  This is most noticeable when driving!  I live out in the suburbs (almost rural).  The majority of the roads have stop signs.  The number of cars NOT stopping at stop signs has been increasing.  And when cars do stop, there appears to be total lack of concern for whom arrived first and I've seen quite a few cars charging through the intersections out of turn, coming ever-closer to causing accidents.

Even worse is what the humble pedestrian must endure!  Woe to them if they are trying to cross the road during high traffic times!  These poor drivers are setting bad examples for their children and for the children in other cars that are witnessing them fail to follow the traffic rules - and if you think the kids aren't paying attention - YOU ARE WRONG!! They see the things the adults do and begin to follow the "if you don't get caught, you're not wrong" mentality.

Ok looking at the above paragraph, I realize it reads like I'm an old lady...and I'm not (at least not to me!)... I'm in my late 40's and am just trying to comprehend the reality I'm living in.

Traffic issues are just a small point.  But the "if you don't get caught, you're not wrong" mentality IS a big issue.  Lots of parents at our local schools are "helping" their kids with homework (in my day that was cheating).  I've heard parents at our local pool telling their kids to ignore the rules unless they get caught.  I even know of a parent who has taken her 4th-grader and a couple of friends to the local Target store and left them their for several hours while she did other things (and NO she didn't leave them a cell phone or give them a way to communicate with her).  I'm pretty sure Target wouldn't approve of that - I know I would be appalled if I found out my child had been left there!

All of these poor behavior examples are observed by our children who absorb it and then start to apply it to their own lives AND all of these examples point to that mentality of "if you don't get caught, you're not wrong".... which is really just a modern day version of the Medici Family's "The End Justifies The Means".  History showed us the Medici mentality gave them free reign to hurt and kill many people - is that really what we're wanting for our children to learn and emulate?  And why are so many adults seeming to walk down that path??

Is it video games?  Is it the lack of corporal punishment in schools as well as at home?  Is it having multiple caregivers causing a lack of parent-child attachment?  Is it the Democrats - or the Republicans?  Is it the poisoning of our environment?  Is it greed, too much television, or the devil?   Or is it that we humans always been this way - but thanks to the information age, it now is just more visible? 

It is ironic that we seem to be having a huge up-swelling of disrespectful adults while we also have an increasing number of baby-boomer adults who will need hands-on care as they continue to age.  PLUS we have a huge number of autism-spectrum children (and other behavior issues) that are increasing each year in our schools and will soon be out of the school systems and requiring part or full-time care.   Who will be caring for all of the elderly and for the special-needs adults?  Probably not adults who have no respect for other people!  Perhaps I'm just being an alarmist, but I truly find it sad that empathy, sympathy, and respect appear to be undesirable traits.

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Why are companies messing around with people's lives?

My husband works for a cellphone company that has an initiative to turn all of it's I/T jobs into contractor positions.  In fact, yesterday my husband's department all got the news that their full-time jobs end in April and IF they don't take the contractor positions offered (no matter what the money or benefits offered), they are out - and no compensation will be given.  Pretty amazing for a company who was on a list of "best places to work" not that long ago!

WHY is it that companies feel that it's a fine thing to do - to save a few bucks and screw with people's lives?  I understand that they are there to make money - but why can they not make money and still have semi-decent values that treat their employees like ... well... employees - a VALUABLE asset?

Companies pull this crap and then wonder why their work-quality suffers.  The products they provide then suffers...and they start cutting even more money.  Why can they not see that it's an ugly, vicious cycle?

Worst of all, is that they are truly playing god with people's lives....and they have no conscious, no guilt, and no shame about causing "regular" people HUGE problems.  Most people affected will be forced to look for new jobs (and that is not a good thing in our current economy).   Many of us will have to take the crap-sandwich that they are offering because we have no alternative... if we don't work, we lose our home.  Even if we do accept their offer, it's very likely that we will slowly lose our home because the salary offered, won't be enough to pay all of our bills.

It's sad that these companies are literally taking profits from screwing low-level employees.  I bet you dollars-to-doughnuts, that all the bigwigs aren't losing money (or jobs)!  In fact, it's probably the opposite - they'll have golden parachutes and receive very nice bonus's for screwing the lower level employees.

Has anyone noticed that the great American dream is dying or dead??  Work hard and get paid for it isn't happening any more.  Work hard and create a good life for you and your family is also dying fast.  Work hard and end up desperately in debt - how the hell did we end up with that option??

As for us, well - we'll be OK.  NO, we don't have enough money saved and YES, we have a lot (make that A LOT!!!) of debt.  But we have each-other, we have our faith, and we have hope.  You upper-management types should be ashamed for what you are doing to the people that work for you - and to our country's economy!!  But we'll be OK in spite of your best efforts to bring us to our knees.

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Are You Excited About The Holidays?

I don't know about you, but I LOVE Christmas!  I love decorating for it.  I love baking for it.  I love all of the events surrounding it.  I love giving gifts (and yes, receiving them too).  And I love the reason for the season (Jesus).

It's such an emotional time - highs of fun times and memories, and lows of missing those who are no longer here to share with us.  Sometimes it's hard to get past the "should have's" and "could have's" to see the wonderful "do have's" that we should celebrate.  For instance, I often miss my mother at this time of year.  When I was younger, her house was always the family gathering place.  All of the extended family would come to our celebrations.  Without her, those gatherings are far more rare.  She never got to meet any of her grandchildren... truly one of my biggest heartaches.  I know she watches from heaven and smiles at them though, and I see her light shining through my daughter's eyes and the eyes of my niece and nephew.  So that's the celebration and joy that I cherish now.. my own family and the beauty of how life goes on.

It's so easy to get caught up in the commercialization of Christmas - "Did we get enough gifts?"  "Is our house decorated enough?"  "Have we seen all the holiday shows we wanted to?"  "Did we cook enough goodies to share and for ourselves?" -  I know our time from Thanksgiving through Christmas (and even through New Year's) will be filled with those thoughts and activities at our house.  And I love all of it... but I try very hard to remember the more important part (and it's hard to do!).  It is Jesus' birth we celebrate because it brought light into the world.  He provides hope and salvation - especially during the darkest times.  The love that we have for our families - especially our children, is nothing compared to the love that God shares with us.  His love is what I try to share with my friends and family, it's what I want my daughter to take with her as she grows into a lovely young lady.  And it's something I share for all of you!

From my family to yours - We hope you have a blessed and loving holiday season!